Premise: Two subordinates pitch TV show ideas to the station president and his slacker son.
President Everton: Alright folks, pitching time. Let’s hear your show ideas for next season. Remember we’re aiming big this year. We want to take on NBC, ABC, CBS, APTN, all the big guns. Johnson, you go first.
Big Johnson and Little Johnson: Okay
Little Johnson: Uhm, Mr. Everton, there are two Johnsons here, you’re going to have to specify.
President Everton: Ok, he’s Big Johnson and you’re Little Johnson.
Little Johnson: We’re the same size though?
President Everton: Oh it’s not about your height Little Johnson, it’s about your value at this company. Big Johnson’s got big ideas. You…well, you have yet to prove me wrong. Big Johnson, show idea, go.
Big Johnson: Ok, imagine this. Everybody loved the hit movie The Horse Whisperer. Everybody loved the hit show The Ghost Whisperer. So everyone will double love our show- The Ghost Horse Whisperer. It’s the gripping tale of a young woman who discovers she can talk to dead horses.
Little Johnson: HA!
President Everton: Little Johnson, shut it! I don’t think this is a comedy.
Big Johnson: No sir this is a coming-of-age drama where our protagonist will discover a lot about herself. And a lot about dead horses. We’ll be aiming for the teen girl market with potential appeal for mothers.
President Everton: Names, Big Johnson.
Big Johnson: Taylor Swift as the lead and Jeff Bridges as the ghost horse mentor.
President Everton: Woolsbury, can we do that?
Woolsbury: I’m afraid not sir, the budget won’t allow it.
Big Johnson: Hilary Duff and Christian Slater.
President Everton: Woolsbury?
Woolsbury: Doable!
President Everton: Great. Next idea-
Little Johnson: Really? You think that show will last even a season?
President Everton: Little Johnson, it’s not your turn! Chet, please tell us your idea.
Chet: K well, how about, it’s about me, chillin, and like, maxin’ out, and then dropping some beats. Aw yeah.
President Everton: Woolsbury?
Woolsbury: Doable.
President Everton: Excellent. That’s our late night block right there.
Little Johnson: That’s three hours. Three hours of your son and his wannabe gangster lifestyle.
Chet: Dawg, come on. It’s pronounced “gangsta”. Be a little culturally sensitive.
President Everton: Little Johnson, since you seem to have a fish up your backside today, let’s hear your idea.
Little Johnson: Why don’t we do an insightful, investigative documentary style program that highlights crime and injustice in parts of the world that aren’t normally covered by mainstream media? Like Venezuela or Kyrgyzstan?
(awkward silence for a few seconds)
Big Johnson: So like, CSI: Kyrgyzstan.
Little Johnson: No, not at all-
President Everton: I like it, I like it! Big Johnson you are on fire today. Woolsbury?
Woolsbury: It’s a CSI show. Red corn syrup and a cast of D-listers. Definitely doable.
President Everton: We got ourselves another winner.
Little Johnson: Really?? If that’s the kind of programming you want to promote, I’m done with this station. I quit.
(Little Johnson leaves)
Big Johnson: Wow. Someone should do a show about him called I Was A Grown Up Drama Queen.
President Everton: Hmmm. Interesting. Names?
Big Johnson: Shia Labeouf as Little Johnson.
President Everton: Woolsbury.
Woolsbury: Are you kidding? We can probably get him to pay us.
President Everton: Winner! Big Johnson, you just got that promotion.
