Their boyfriends though… are occasionally dubious choices, and it’s often a grin-and-bear-it moment when I meet them. I’m usually thinking “Really. This chudmeister is capable of attracting this smart, funny girl and I’m not.”
A few of the guys that I’ve been passed over for:
– A guy who spent his entire paycheck on bulk candy
– A guy who considers personal hygiene a casual affair
– A guy who failed ninth grade geography three (!!!) times
– A guy who looked like Weird Al if Weird Al had his head caught in a vice grip and then vertically stretched in photoshop (his head was really thin)
– A guy who still quotes Three Days Grace lyrics despite being in his mid-20’s
– A guy whose biggest achievement in life thus far is Employee of the Month at Dunkin’ Donuts
– A guy who has only like 12 followers on Twitter and only 98 Facebook friends
And none of these goobers have even read Infinite Jest.
But OH WELL- different strokes for different folks! Some folks like Julian Casablancas. Some folks like Nikolai Fraiture. And some folks like heat stroke.