And maaaaan my body does not even know what to do when I’m feeling legitimately happy. Fortunately that’s not often because I think it overloads my system and then I get major chest pains. I’m talking like actual joy here, which is so rare for me that I take a mental snapshot every time I do actually feel it. Last time was May 28th, 2013. I was in Toronto’s Union Station about to board a train to the Molson Canadian Amphitheatre. It was about 3:30 pm and I was listening to Daft Punk’s “Doin’ It Right” and I just suddenly felt actually happy and it was real weird. My body was just like “wtf is happening!!”. The reason was because I had recently been texting a girl I had had a crush on for a year and a bit and it really seemed as though she liked me and we even had a plan to meet up the following week and everything. And the thought that finally someone was reciprocating my feelings was too much to handle and I had to sit down.
Anyway, obviously I was wrong and she turned me down later, because what was she gonna do, NOT turn me down?
But that moment was kinda cool and I’m a little jealous of people who regularly feel happy. I think I’m averaging once every two years for the past decade and bit.